Brave Mind: Rugby's charity tackling the stigma of mental health and signposting people to help

"It's not a sign of weakness being vulnerable. It's being brave, being courageous and saying: 'Look, my mind at the moment isn't quite right, and I want to get it right in order to live my life in a happy and healthy way."

Above are the words of Simon Trower, founder of Brave Mind, a newly established charity with the stated goal of tackling the stigma of mental health in rugby head on.

In Mental Health Awareness Week, Sky Sports sought to learn more about Brave Mind - its mission, story and inspirations.

According to the charity, 25 per cent of those playing rugby experience poor mental health. Trower and co seek to make talking about mental health and supporting one another in the rugby community the norm.

"Rugby has always been a huge part of my life, and part of my family's life," Trower says.

"In the rugby world, that bravado, that strength, the whole contact and physicality on the pitch, you don't want to back down, it's a battle out there.

"It's not a sign of weakness being vulnerable. It's being brave, being courageous and saying: 'Look, my mind at the moment isn't quite right, and I want to get it right in order to live my life in a happy and healthy way.'

"Why Brave Mind? It's very personal to me. Away from rugby, depression and anxiety has always been there for me. It's affected a lot of things in my life.

"It's affected my relationships, my family - the amount of hurt I put my family through - and I'm truly sorry for that.

"And now I have children, I don't want them to be affected by my journey. They are a huge driver for me now.

"It's probably not until this present time, that I feel comfortable in myself, and about talking about it."

At Brave Mind, combatting toxic masculinity and a deep-rooted culture within rugby is paramount.

The website states: "Toxic masculinity drives self-reliance and emotional repression leading to depression, increased stress, substance abuse and suicide."

The charity lists five stated goals and ambitions:

1. Provide a support network that is readily available to members of the rugby community of all ages, backgrounds, orientation and at all levels of the game.

2. To create an active Brave Mind community to support players and staff in partnership with leading mental health charities

3. Have a Brave Mind champion in every club in the UK and Ireland.

4. To assist rugby governing bodies (RFU, SRU etc) in the creation of mental health modules for its Coaching Certification Programme.

5. To hold regular Brave Mind events across the rugby game in the UK and Ireland.

"Now I have the strength to be able to talk about it a lot more openly, I want to get that message across to people: there is light at the end of the tunnel and people there to help," Trower adds.

"Since setting Brave Mind up only a few months ago, the amount of people that I've spoken to who've been on similar journeys to me...

"It's okay to be vulnerable, to feel vulnerable, that's all about being brave and courageous and putting your hand up and saying you do need help.

"We're all about creating that safe environment, to help people and signpost people to help."

"When it got a bit too much eventually, I started drinking, and not really playing rugby anymore ... I just neglected everything in life that I needed, just to drink and sleep."

Brave Mind's Mike Guida shares his story:

"I wanted to not be in that dark hole. I didn't want to feel how I felt every day, I wanted to have that happiness back.

"It started quite a few years back for me, probably when I was in college. I wouldn't say I was bullied as such, but I definitely didn't take 'banter', as people call it, the same way and was always the butt of the jokes.

"I thought I was fine with that but didn't really deal with it.

"When it got a bit too much eventually, I started drinking, and not really playing rugby anymore - which was the reason I got to university in the first place. I just neglected everything in life that I needed, just to drink and sleep.

"When I went through my toughest point, I tried to do something silly now I look back on it. I cut myself a couple of times.

"I wasn't one of those people that had issues with self-harm, I just wanted to feel something. So eventually, I tried to take some pills, and I kind of was always on that edge where I took them and swallowed them, but then 'swallowed them back up'. I didn't know what was going on with me.

"I was always on that edge until one night my mate found me basically crying outside in the corner of our garden, and he helped me call my dad.

"I was at my lowest, and I didn't want to turn to my friends, but they were there when I needed them, as well as my family.

"If I didn't have that, that support group around me, I don't know where I'd be today.

"I'm an open book about it now. There's nothing really to hide because for me, I was trying to hide in the first place, so I'm better off being open.

"I kind of always looked for that end point of it all, even throughout my counselling, but there isn't really an end. It does get better, but you've got to want to make it better."

"I was probably one of the first to push the drinking games and to goad people, but I absolutely hated those kind of engagements because I felt very vulnerable and very alone."

Brave Mind's Adrian Smith shares his story:

"On the outside, people would say a very confident, strong-minded individual, but underneath, so much self-doubt and negative self-talk was going on that transcended everything I did

"I learnt and found a way to suppress and cope with that, which ultimately has driven towards the start of my depression.

"I think my mental health journey started, on reflection, when I was at school. I have memories of getting very upset being dropped off at nursery and primary school, and I was always someone who struggled to make friends, or to fit in.

"Sport was probably my only outlet, and I had a particular drawing to rugby. It was something I was good at, and rugby accepts all shapes and sizes. Which was fantastic, but it also was a good place for me to hide.

"I would very much buy-in to that masculine side of rugby, so whilst I was probably one of the first to push the drinking games and to goad people, I absolutely hated those kind of engagements because I felt very vulnerable and very alone.

"What I didn't realise was I was suppressing my real emotions. And that probably lasted 25 years. It was only in the last year and a half that I started to really struggle with my mental health.

"A good friend of mine gave me the push to go and talk to someone and get some help. That started me on a journey initially with a counsellor, who then suggested I was probably suffering with anxiety and depression.

"Even saying the world depression now is hard, it chokes me up saying it, but that's what I have and it's nothing to be ashamed of. It's me.

"I've found talking about it with close friends and those I trust, being more vulnerable, has really helped me start to connect with myself more, which is key.

"I'm still on the journey, it's going to take time, but I think talking to others and connecting with others is the most powerful thing for me, and has helped me move forward.

"I saw Simon starting something called Brave Mind as I was going through my journey, and that resonated with me so powerfully, particularly in the rugby world.

"My personal mission is if I can help people who are in my situation, in particular those early teens who are maybe struggling, that would be fantastic because I don't want people to end up in the situation I'm in for the sake of not feeling they can talk or open up to people."